We found out today that tomorrow (Friday, April 3) is Todd's last day of treatment. Dr Yom decided today (Thursday) that she didn't want him to come on Monday; instead she wants him to have a good double-zap of radiation to end it.
I was counting down the days, and all of a sudden here it is! It is such a relief for me, I can only imagine how it will feel for Todd. Right now I think he is too fatigued to feel much of anything. (Tomorrow will be draining for him as well, as he has the 8:00 radiation/nutritionist and then back to the city for the 2:45 radiation/Dr. Yom appointment). Monday will also still be busy: I will try and arrange IV fluids at Kaiser for Monday a.m. as we have an afternoon appointment at UCSF to see Dr. Dubey, and another with Dr. Liu back at Kaiser (which luckily is only 5 minutes from our house).
But we are officially entering the next phase: HEALING. With no more treatments zapping him, he will gradually regain his strength and get off the meds. He will have IV fluids at Kaiser three times a week for at least the next couple of weeks, and then hopefully he will be drinking enough water on his own. We will see how it goes, as his throat is very sore now and it is taking a long time for him to down 8 oz because he is so, so tired (he falls asleep sitting up), and he can only take a small sip at a time. The mucus is very thick now, and his voice has completely changed. It is lower and quieter. His is face is much thinner, as is the rest of him. The other day I thought to myself, "Now I know how my husband will look when he is 80 years old!" (I guess I'll be keeping him! :) Dr. Yom said today, "You look beat up, like you've been through the war. " It's been a long, grueling time since that diagnosis in early December, but Spring makes everything seem possible, doesn't it?
The kids seem to be doing well. They came with us to UCSF today as they are on Spring Break this week. They met Dr. Yom and took photos for Lauren's senior project on cancer (her idea). The 8 of us crowded into the tiny exam room (5 of us, plus the doctor, nurse and trial coordinator!). Everyone was being a good sport about it, and it made me see my kids for a quick minute through the eyes of a stranger. How alive and vibrant they are! How did they get to be 14, 16 and 18 so quickly? They used to be constantly on my mind, and with Todd's cancer always to the fore these past several months, I found myself ocassionally thinking, "Oh yeah, the kids!" when many hours had gone by without even a random thought about them!
It is such a joy to see them hanging out together and having fun as siblings (I know it doesn't last long, but it is nice to know that it does happen!). Lauren has taken them shopping and out for food occasionally.Tomorrow she is driving them to Stinson Beach, as what is spring break without the beach. I want them just to have a great time and come back safe and sound.
Thank you all again for the meals and help driving, and positive thoughts and prayers, and text messages, cards and flowers. We have been blessed by your many kindnesses! I will keep up the blog, as Todd has quite a ways to go before he is himself again. I will do everything I can to get him back there!
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Hi Bon,
ReplyDeleteWhat a long run it has been. Just reading about Todd's treatments and how it was affecting his body was so grueling...I can't imagine how he took it. He is a strong, determined guy. That was so nice to hear the whole gang was in the photo shoot! Lauren and Carolyn and Dashiel are just angels...Todd's little guardian angels! And you are his partner. He could not get a closer soul-mate.
I know having you in his life makes everything possible. Whew! The storm is over...Todd can rest each night a little easier that tomorrow will not be more of the same.
Thanks for taking the time to write this blog. I look forward to reading it every day. You always had a knack for writing...who knew all the ways you would use it!
Love you all!!
xxxxooooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxooo!!
C
Hurray, the last treatment! Now the healing process can begin. I'm sure Todd will respond well to all your T.L.C. Please let us know how we can help. Enjoy that glass of wine - you deserve it! Love, Deb
ReplyDeleteWhat great news that the treatments are over and the healing can begin...it will all just be a memory soon, and you will both be able to read this blog and marvel how you got though it all. It's so great that you've chronicled this whole experience so thorougly as our memories tend to fade and we only remember the good things. Get well soon, Todd!
ReplyDeleteAudrey in Oregon
Yes and ditto to everything C has just said!! I am so very very pleased you guys are at the end of this part of the journey. Your courage and fortitude during this ordeal has been an inspiration to both me and my family. We all take eveyday life like it will always be there the same old way, and now I have a new prospective and outlook in dealing with these precious days and treating each one as a blessing. As Todd grows stronger and reclaims his life as he knew it, and things get back to a more normal routine, I know he will be so proud of Bonnie and how she managed to keep up this diary of these days from hell and still do everything else... she has been amazing, to say the least. But then we knew that about her already!! And Todd has been so brave to keep going day after day and not giving up..his courage and determination has been awesome. Those 3 sweet kids have done an incredible job stepping up and pitching in and supporting T and B with love in every possible way. I am so pleased the Brookhart Family has remained strong and have victory in sight. I am so proud to have them as my friends...God Bless, Love, Dona
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on getting through the long haul! Though I'm sure you felt every moment of it, I'm guessing all the traveling, adjusting to new circumstances, and seeking new comforts helped make six weeks go faster than you could have imagined. I'm so glad to know Todd is on the other side of all those nasty, necessary treatments.
ReplyDeleteSpring is the time of new beginnings and new growth, the perfect time for Todd to soak up some sun and ease his way back to his true weight, energy, self. I hope each day brings Todd more relief from painful and difficult side effects, and added strength and focus to head you all back toward the real life you've had to temporarily put on hold.
Love to you all,
Beth